All Good Things Must Come To An End

from the factory floor

BARCLAYS PREMIER LEAGUE

Loftus Road

Referee:  Mike Dean

Queens Park Rangers 2-1 Arsenal         31 March 2012

Taarabt [22]            Walcott [37]

Diakite [66]

Upon arrival at the Factory I discovered that despite the awesome gigantitude of our new flag [let’s be honest, because of it] we were shunted upstairs once again to the main floor, where tourists to New York probably don’t want to see a big fucking cannon. In the end it was probably better that way. In our last four encounters with Herr Barton in the League we have dropped seven points and received three suspensions.

Instead, we were spared the ignominy that defeat to Joey Barton was sure to bring from other supporters clubs, particularly the Chelsea mob downstairs. There are also delicious IPAs on draft behind Liam’s bar, even if he has to walk a country mile to get to them [of course we ordered them separately to force multiple journeys]. So, if you’re going to lose to a pseudo-intellectual twit bossed by a pseudo-managerial twat, at least you can drown your sorrows in a nice ale. Or eight.

Easy Does It

from the factory floor

BARCLAYS PREMIER LEAGUE

Ashburton Grove

Referee:  Phil Dowd

Arsenal 3-0 Aston Villa  24 March 2012

Gibbs [16]

Walcott [25]

Arteta [90]

Saturday morning arrived and I packed up for my first trip to the pub in a while. Huge flag. Check. Bottle of Woodford. Check. [There is a certain symmetry that on the day I honor this bet, we play Aston Villa]. Regina joined me this time for a rare foray into the sweary, smelly nether regions of the Factory. I introduced her to Liam before heading downstairs to hang the new NY Gooners flag. He apologized to her. It’s what most people do when they find out she’s my girlfriend.

The game barely got going enough to realize Djourou was in for Koscielny before Heskey clocked the former in the face with a deliberate elbow. Predictably TJ and I disagreed. Also predictably, as with most Phil Dowd officiated affairs, I’m right [Then again, he’s got all that podcasting nous and I just make meticulous drawings of joyous Arsenal moments to dull the pain of the recent barren spell].