Here Come The Arteta

Well won Arteta. He might fancy a dip here.....YEESSS!

I think a lot of Gooners were well pleased as news filtered through late on the 31st of August that the Arsenal had prised Mikel Arteta away from Everton. Having just released one of the best midfielders on the planet back to his little home town side, and let the chinless androgynous mercenary many thought would replace him go as well, we were looking well short in the middle of the park. And I'm not just talking about Jack's height. To make Mata's worse, our target to replace Cesc in the market went to Chelsea instead.

The talks stalled in a typical bit of brinkmanship from our club, and in the end it took a transfer request and a drop in wage demands from Arteta to push the deal through at the eleventh hour. Typical Arsenal. After a loyal stint at Everton and despite being central to their plans, he was desperate to take the chance to join us and get his shot in the Champions League and to push for the Premier League title. Before he even took the pitch he took one for the team.

We All Took The Red Pill, Now We're Dodging Bullets

from the factory floor

BARCLAYS PREMIER LEAGUE

Ashburton Grove

Referee:  Anthony Taylor

Arsenal 3-3 Norwich City         5 May 2012
Benayoun [2]           Hoolahan [12]
Van Persie [72,80]   Holt [27]

                                     Morison [85]

Now I know that in the twittersphere and other places of cyber-angst the build-up to this last home match revealed some proper jangling nerves, and on evidence of the ground atmosphere at the Grove and the flat performance on the pitch, that anxiety was very much alive in the physical Gooner plane,  if not just a little worse. When I arrived at the Factory after another lovely unannounced subway diversion it was 2-1 Norwich, prompting me to quote Rashida from earlier in the week as my greeting to Steven, Ed, and the Captain, already seated at the lower level bar: What in the actual fuck?

Apparently Benayoun scored a pearl of a goal from the dressing room and we felt the job was done. That early score belied our recent trend of coming out in the last handful of games flatter than an old white man’s ass. As if to make up for that, in the following fifteen minutes we conspired to gift the visitors two goals and with it the deficit that we apparently need to stir us from our perennial late season torpor. The Captain explained that while we deserved to be behind, the goals still had that special jammy quality that only the Arsenal concede. As to make up for that unique talent, we seem to do it with alarming regularity. This whole improvement of the hospitality at the stadium on match days is going just a bit too far.

Not Your Father's Football

"Foreign glory hunter." You get this a lot if you tour the comments sections of many Arsenal blogs or other football fora. I'm long enough in the Gooner tooth to understand that Arsenal are a club many a neutral love to hate. I can understand that. In the thirties Chapman took a team from the 'soft' south of England and transformed them into the best club in the land, dominating in a manner that the likes of Liverpool and Manchester United wouldn't do for decades.

In the late nineties and early naughties a bookish looking, diet-conscious, tee-totaling Frenchman came along and upset the holy equilibrium of lad football culture by taking the same glorious club to still unequaled heights. In less time than it took Alex Ferguson to get his hands on a league title, Arsene Wenger did so three times and along the way produced an unbeatable team, rocking the throne of Ferguson's United with a bunch of hardly known cast-offs from the continent and beyond. When money was proving the way in the newly anointed Premier League, Wenger showed them a cheaper solution without sacrificing all the swashbuckling style. 

A Little Less Conversation, A Little More Football Please

from the factory floor

BARCLAYS PREMIER LEAGUE

Brittania Stadium

Referee:  Chris Foy

Stoke City 1-1 Arsenal             28 April 2012

Crouch [9]               Van Persie [15]

Knowing that none of the other "big" sides have come away from the Brittania with anything more than a single point, and that the Arsenal have only ever got full value there at the very high cost of Aaron Ramsey's leg, you could say this trip to the Factory came with some anxiety mixed in with the usual excited anticipation.  A change to the subway schedule lost me an extra 15 minutes and served to rumble my nerves that much more, despite the attempt at soothing it with delicious, football-gods-appeasing bacon.

The angst of my late arrival was calmed somewhat by the discovery that our spanking new NY Gooner flag was making its debut on the main level. I sidled up to the bar underneath it to find Tin Lid, TJ, Kaiser and a one-nil scoreline to the towel boys courtesy of a Peter Crouch header. Ed and the Captain would join moments later. Apparently Chris Foy had already booked Dean Whitehead for a studs first tackle in the first five minutes, but it still looked to me that Stoke were going to put in another shift of overstepping the margins of fair play.

Close The Deal

Recently I wrote bemoaning the typical canned comments about lessons learned with respect to winning against lower-table opposition. For the past handful of seasons we have witnessed Arsenal sides of varying permutations raise their performance levels when facing sides competing for European places, only to shit the bed when facing the promoted sides and/or relegation fodder. 

To wit, I was referring to the loss to QPR and the subsequent win versus Man City. While we followed that win with another against Wolves, somewhat addressing this tendency, we went into the Wigan match at home perhaps feeling that just showing up would secure the points. It only took ten minutes for the visitors to exploit our lethargic start and secure their first ever victory on our ground. Our performance that day was especially galling because there was every indication that Wigan would give us a game, having just beaten United for the first time full stop, after only losing to Chelsea on the back of some offside howlers and taken three points at Anfield before that.